When is too much too much?

Here I sit, digesting and thinking about when I can eat more. The food was so good. Is it really THAT good or is it because we only cook like this occasionally? So many foods from our sentimental past. My grandma's noodles were a feature this year - they turned out perfectly. The turkey (which I only eat if I can see it wandering the field before it's brought to our table) was divine. Gravy - this year an exact science that couldn't have been better. I always forget something - this year it was the dressing (sitting in the freezer from a double batch made at Thanksgiving). But with minutes to spare I shoved it in the micro to thaw and a quick blast in a hot oven, then spooned onto waiting plates at the table. We didn't even REALLY need it, but hey, at least I remembered!

The dilemma - no room in the fridge which is the size of a medicine chest. So much food left over plus leftover chinese take out from Christmas eve. What to do? Why didn't we cut back? Why didn't I leave the dressing in the freezer? And also food in the fridge from the weekend Christmas open house. Oy. We'll be taking some of it round to friends. I will dream about the turkey sandwich (or as my daughter spells it 'sanwij') I will have tomorrow. You see?? I am already dreaming of the time I can eat more and I'm still in great discomfort from the food I've just had!! TOO MUCH FOOD makes you crazy.

I didn't make dessert this year because I knew with just four people (one of them being four years old) we simply wouldn't need it. Yet we're making ice cream sundaes shortly. With home made chocolate chip cookies. You see?? It never ends. The holiday of stuffing oneself.
Where is my self control? My willpower? Did I leave it in my stocking or wrap it and send it away by mistake?? Geez, I hope not - I'm gonna need it when the whole new year's resolutions kick in!!

later mashed tater and merry hoho

When the countdown gets to 1!

Hi there me.

It's Christmas eve here in Bedford-town, UK. We've picked up our free and happy turkey from the local farmer, dropped off cards, bought last minute shopping and baked cookies. We're headed over to some friends for ghost stories (!), mulled wine, a christmas film or two for the kiddies and something involving the words 'take out' for dinner. All the ramping up to bring us to this day. Tomorrow is Christmas in this house. What fun!

I'll do another post once the dust has settled, the smoke has cleared and I can see over my stomach after Christmas dinner. For anyone else reading this - Happy Holidays!

later xmas tater!

the downward spiral shaped like a holiday

So, we're counting. Yep. I bet you are, too. It's December 1st today. 23 days until Christmas. 23 days until the fat man comes down our chimney and leaves a doll that is a princess that turns into a fairy with purple or green wings under the tree ('i'm not sure santa understands what you're describing my sweetie'). 23 days until i become a whirling cooking maniac. 23 days until my husband eats an entire tin (I mean a BIG tin) of Celebrations mini-chocolates all by himself, starting at around 6:30am. 23 days until we swear we won't buy 'this much stuff ever again!!'. Do we even remember how this holiday came to be in the first place? I try. I try and find time between Christmas shopping, wrapping gifts, addressing cards and trying to obtain desired food stuffs. Between the girls' Christmas dinner, the daughter's Christmas pageant, and the various other holiday experiences that must happen. I sound really put out don't I?

But here's the thing. I LOVE this time of year. I love that my husband gets to be home for about 10 days straight. I love that there is no school. I love that we get a REAL tree (even though my husband REALLY disagrees with this). I love the hokey faux church with rainbow lights that we put out near a window. I love the food (the best free range bird we can find). I love the stories and the tipple, the neighbours dropping round. One gift on Christmas Eve and chinese food. I love it because it's mine to create. I can take all the things I really loved about Christmas when I was a kid and transform it - create something like it but more personalised for my daughter. It's her Christmas memories I'm making now. I want them to be warm and fuzzy, very special and full of fun.

So, although it feels like a downward spiral because I put every bit of this work on myself, it's actually a countdown to a great time with my little family. Everyday she asks 'Mommy, is tomorrow Christmas' and I answer 'in three weeks' and she says 'in three days?' and I say 'no in three weeks'. The advent calendar will be out this week and the fun begins. She'll see the countdown for herslf. We'll take her to a caroling service this year at a church in the town center. She'll have newly created decorations that she made in school for our tree. We'll video her performance as an angel in the school production. It's all going to be magical because I'll
see so much of it through her eyes. It's changed the holiday for us. It's magic.

Happy holidays everyone!
x

thanks alot actually!

Today, here in the UK, we celebrated (in our house) Thanksgiving. It was wonderful. Good friends came over with children and the adults ate, chatted, napped, and even watched a bit of telly. It was super.

The meal came off without a hitch (except for the salmon which I forgot to make - microwave, I love you!). My own cornbread dressing (aka stuffing), a free range bird (we'll call her Lilly), homemade giblet gravy, roasted garlic mash, sweet potato casserole (with tri-color marshmallows, of course!!), and green beans as a garnish. Yum, I say it again, yum.

I couldn't have done it without my favourite helper, my Jojo. He is stellar on holidays. He LOVES the food therefore he is on hand to do anything, anything at all to help it on it's way to the table and then as a token of appreciation, he does the washing up. What a dream.

The kids got on splendidly and didn't fight (well the brother and sister did ONCE, that in itself is amazing for a full 6+ hour period). They tried everything they were given to eat and were most patient when the grownups wanted some quiet time to digest and try and force down a cup of tea/coffee.

The weather bit the big one so in a way, it was a blessing because this kept us indoors and visiting, gaining a bit more quality time with our lovely friends. The house felt so cozy and our friends were so at home that one of them napped on the sofa. A true compliment I say.

If I could have had one wish it would have been that I hadn't lost my voice the night before due to the dregs of a cold. So I was croaky and whispery most of the day, no singing for me. Maybe a good thing?

Ok, and one more wish (since we're wishin' and all) is that all the crap we loaded up onto our queen size bed in an effort to make the downstairs more hospitable (and indeed habitable) was magically put away by the tidy up fairy. Alas, it was still there when I drug my tired butt to bed. It's now all over our floor. A fire hazard, yes probably. I'll sort it tomorrow.

I hope that everyone else who celebrated Thanksgiving was able to just sit and enjoy themselves for a few minutes. So much effort to travel and cook, etc. Do we give thanks on this day?

Which reminds me, we totally forgot to give thanks so here it is:

Thank you for my lovely family, my beautiful daughter and lovely husband. Thank you for my health (laryngitis not withstanding), my home, my quality of life and my wonderful friends. Thank you for my mom and grandmothers who encouraged me to cook, showed me what they could and passed on their cookbooks. Thanks very much indeed.

Until next time, ciao!

A life of halves

I've never been one to worry too much about weight. I was a tall skinny kid who developed hips in my teen years (sadly not a matching pair of breasts) and then in college and my twenties I kept everything even stevens by lots of dancing, skipping meals, working four part time jobs, etc. My late 20's and early 30's brought on a weight gain due to a marriage and then the loss of that weight through divorce. Anyway, suffice to say I had the normal thoughts a woman would have about her shape but I never had to go on lots of diets.

Alas, this was not to continue (can you HEAR the violins, can you, CAN YOU??). A baby at 40 and I'm still fighting off the weight gain. Anyway, I got into fitness a bit, triathlon a bit (I am the least habitual person you'll ever meet so nothing sticks, I'm like the wrong side of velcro!).

Now I realise I am not a woman who is a candidate for Biggest Loser. But I have a great deal of respect for anyone who is trying to get the scale to go down the otherway, regardless of whether it's 10lbs or 100lbs. To control diet, to make time to exercise, to drink water, to get everyone around you on board, to exercise self control in the face of tempation, the deck is stacked against you to be sure.

I have been reading a book called 'In Defense of Food' by Michael Pollan. Enlightening to say the least. There is so much advise out there and so many 'experts'. I have tried a few things with limited results - limited either because the loss wasn't notable or I didn't keep it off (back to that least habitual thing). So what's a poor 'I am NOT weighint THAT!' girl to do??

Enter the land of halves. Let's face it - all portions are too big in the western diet. I am NOT going to starve. So if I take what's in front of me and 'break' it in half, I'll A. enjoy the food and shut off the hunger alarm and B. not overeat and C. possibly eat the rest in a couple of hours.

It seems to be working - the ultimate result is a few smaller meals. It does mean stopping yourself. It means eating with AWARENESS. It means not caving in. It means feeling a little hungry in the day. But as long as your blood sugar level is happy (I must keep mine up a little bit or no one wants to come near me) and you're hydrated and feeling good, you're ok.

What we're talking about is portion size. A protein portion should just fit in the palm of your hand. A 1/2 pound cheeseburger (sure it's a HALF of a POUND but don't be a smartass!) doesn't do that, or a full size chicken breast for that matter.

Eating WITHOUT thinking spells weight gain, and possibly health problems. Eating WITH thought brings about a bit of control, enjoyment and knowledge. By knowledge I mean you KNOW what you're eating, you've thought about it. It's something you know ticks all the boxes - some protein, a little bit of carb and fat (try and stay as far from processed anything as you can). Here is an example: In London on way to a meeting. Gotta find something I can eat but don't want too much. Don't want a sandwich. Find a falafel and humous and salad wrap - cut into two pieces. Perfect. Ate one at the meeting and one a couple of hours later waiting for the train home.

Sure, I'm enthusiastic now but that's because in 5 days I've seen results. And the first day is always the hardest, after that it starts to make sense and come a bit easier.

Wow, so that was preachy. But I like to share when I get excited about something.
I have half decaf, half-n-half, half a wine so it was only a matter of time, wasn't it?

Oh, the one thing I don't sacrifice is breakfast - I may not eat much if I don't feel like it but breakfast shouldn't be too skimpy (or skipped at all). A piece of toast - no way is that gonna hold ya. A pain chocolat? Now that's just silly afterall this is a kind of diet. But a piece of toast with a hard (or soft) boiled egg - good. It's the lunch and dinner that can be pared down and the snacks need to be pared down and REAL. Bag of Doritos? Not real. An apple? Real. 1/2 pack of salted peanuts? Real. Pringles? Definitely not real. A Snickers, nope. Some dried fruit and seeds? In small portions, good.

Anyway, you get the idea. Oh, with strenuous exercise, make sure you get your calories in - halves is probably not for you!

later half a tater

So it's not daily, but it's there!

Hello me (and you if anyone else is reading). We've made it through three full weeks of school and are now well into October! Hooray. The weather is changing and soup is on the stove. The indian summer here was beautiful to say the least, but I think it's on the wane.

I had hoped to sit down every day and add some witty, interesting, possibly humourous post - it hasn't happened. Much as cleaning the house on a regular basis hasn't, tidying toys, nope, nightly dishes, uh-uh, clothes always put up, that would be NO Bob. (Sigh). It just doesn't come naturally. What to do? How do we 'g' ourselves up? How do we motivate ourselves to carry out the most mundane of tasks when we are so flamin' tired?? Everyone else's needs get met (mostly) and then the house?? The bank accounts?? The cooking and cleaning?? Oh dear. How do those amazing women do it all??

I suspect they don't sit on their butts at 7:00 to eat something and watch Voyager reruns. I suspect they don't go to bed at 9:30 whenever they can (or earlier if we're really cooking with lazy gas). I suspect their husband is a bit more anal and keeps up with stuff as much as they do. I suspect they hire someone. Hmmmm. Not an option right now so, darn it, it looks like it's going to have to be me. Poor house. Poor family. Last seen gasping for last breath underneath a pile of papers, clothing, books and random stuff. They didn't sign up for this, did they? I feel like I am letting them (and myself) down.

But am I really??? Houses are lived in - that's what families do. There is so much going on in a four year old's life, does it matter that her toys aren't picked up daily or that things end up where they are dropped? Well, a little bit, it does. If I want her to be different - to learn about taking care of her things and keeping up with the endless wave of mess, then I must lead by example. I know this and I already see signs that she is following my hopeless lead.

I WILL get better. I need to go to something like LAA (Lazy Ass Anonymous) or have some treatment for Allergic to doing stuff after 4pm. I have great waves of motivation at 10am (any body clock specialist will tell you this is true) but 4pm? Fahgitabowtit.

Well, in the time it took me to type this I coulda done the dishes. My computer is a constant source of distraction - I can procrastinate indefinitely thanks to the internet!

Ok, ok, I'm going.
Later tater.

First day of school

Howdy folks (well, me actually but I'll pretend I'm not the only follower!).

It's been a couple of weeks. Today is the first major milestone for a four year old here in the UK. FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL. I did well. Not too teary, just a little bit as I walked away. My girl looked lovely, very grown up and walked in without a hitch or a single glance backward. Well done grasshopper. Now I teach how to cook dinner.

What have I done with my two hour window of time?? Well, let's see! There's the glider lesson, the bikini wax, the phone book to memorise and then of course I need to alphabetise my paperback collection...oh wait! Two HOURS. That's right folks, two whole hours for the first four months. Half days. Which is lucky really because I can get a little bit done in the mornings and still have afternoons to play. I know you are thinking I can't do math - 9am to 12pm is THREE hours. But you see, it's a 30 minute walk there and back, so I have to leave time to travel. We're going to try out the bikes tomorrow and see how we get on.

My husband asked me on the way back if this day had brought back any memories for me of my first day of school. You see, I can't remember it, not a thing. He can remember quite alot from early childhood, including his first day of school. I hope my little girl will remember. Hopefully her memory will be more like her dad's when it comes to long term (his short term memory? Fahgitabodit). I DO remember some things, don't get me wrong. Just not the first day. Do you?

With only one hour left before I have to start heading back up the road I am off to the gym - I am sure they have missed me in there since July. My waistline has most certainly missed it.

Later tater